Role Play

wp-1463707873180.jpgWednesday, February 24, 2016: “I’m gonna talk with Logan* about filing for separation. Maybe living apart will help bring clarity to the relationship.”

I’m the wife that sent a text. A text to her husband while he was away during the week training to become a cop. That’s me.

Was that the most sensitive way to break that kinda news? No. It was scary and gut-wrenching, but it was the best option for me. It was a selfish act that I do not regret.

In my whole life I’ve never shared important news when it was the “right moment” for the person receiving it. I value what I have to express enough to make it the right moment for myself and what I’m communicating.

I have been processing a lot. Trying to put into words what I’m experiencing, and this is the first time since that text that I’m feeling the “right moment” to start writing is here.

If you’ve read my blogs before, you know that I do not sugar coat, nor do I host a pity party. The same goes for this chapter in my life.

I do not anticipate my upcoming blogs to be in chronological order. My brain has never processed that way. In a little over a years time, I’ve had a miscarriage, cut off ties with my parents, changed jobs, and separated from my husband.

On paper, I look like I’m going through an identity crisis: piercings, tattoos, racy pictures, crazy hair. . .I mean, let’s be honest, how many of you are thinking “Bless, she’s gone off the deep end trying to find herself.” Shoot, I’ve even thought that a time or two!

Am I just going through a phase where I’m shooting up my middle finger to traditional society? Freeing myself from organized religion, family and relationships?

Or am I finally giving myself permission to be my authentic self? Am I realizing that just because I’m good at making things work, I should continue doing so at the cost of my own well being? Am I awakening to the fact that I’ve lived my whole life being cast in a role that didn’t suit me?

A lot of times, our childhood forces us to play a part. You become so good at “acting” and following the guidelines that you loose your true self. But when we are adults, we have the CHOICE not to carry those skills into relationships and end up repeating cycles.

So why do you continue playing the part? Because you are good a that role! It’s the only role you’ve played and you know what to expect. You have the lines memorized. You’ve become the character. And most importantly, others have learned what to expect from your performance.

I wonder how many of us have played a part for so long, we don’t even know how to function outside of that realm. We accept the fact that we should stick to what we’re good at. That we shouldn’t disappoint others by being authentic.

Take a look at the stage you are on. You chose to audition. You knew what you were signing up for. So is it the best role for you? Do you audition for the same part each time, or do you learn something from each show to help you choose a better character the next time around.

*marriage counselor

 

Happy Lamp Review

!*!*!* GOODNESS ALERT *!*!*!

I have struggled with Seasonal Affective Disorder for as long as I can remember.

Last year a friend let me try her Happy Lamp. . . and I felt like myself again! I bought my own compact version for about $40 on Amazon & used it every morning until the days started to get longer.

Happy LampIn addition to treating SAD, the lamp has been extremely helpful for cubicle life! My co-workers & I enjoy it daily. I keep it on my desk behind pictures and such for an indirect glow.

Now that it’s winter again, I just move items out of the way for direct light therapy 🙂

If you’ve done light therapy (or have questions), let me know!!!

Purchase Link: http://amzn.to/1wIgZuz

 

Boo Tea Review

*~*~*~*~*~PRODUCT REVIEW~*~*~*~*~*

I found out about BooTea on Instagram an noticed that it was very popular and was always posed with super toned/skinny gals.

So of COURSE I had to do some research for y’all and see what the noise was about!!

I started by researching the ingredients and found that this particular brand of “teatox” included the best herbs for detox.

It shipped EXTREMELY quick from the UK. . .got it in two days. Their social media presence is very fun and their packaging is super cute. The tea bags are durable and pyramid-shaped for quality infusion.

I didn’t notice much from the Day Time tea. It tasted great (added 2 packs of sugar) and it may have helped with water retention, but nothing to write home about.

The Bed Time tea warns you to drink it at least 8 hrs before you plan to wake up. Because of this warning, I got scared and drank it 10 hrs before I wanted to wake up. . .which resulted in a 2am “throne session”. That first night was HORRIBLE. I questioned my very existence!!! But after that session, I was good.

I learned that being woke up to take care of business didn’t work well for my schedule (or psyche), so I started drinking the tea a 3pm. This was a MUCH better experience.

With two days remaining, I noticed that the Bed Time tea wasn’t AS EFFECTIVE as it had been. After doing more research about how detox works in general, I learned that there quite literally aren’t any mass amounts of toxins left to clear out!

I did not loose any weight by the end of the 14 days- which is fine because that wasn’t my goal. I did, however feel much better and know for sure that whatever was causing some recent tummy troubles got cleared out.

If you have a lot of toxins in your body, this might be an effective weight loss product IN ADDITION TO a better diet and exercise. It will give your system a great jump start to get things going in the right direction.

For those with a healthy lifestyle, this would be very helpful after a winter of splurging during holiday feasting! After 14 days, you’ll be right back to your pre-holiday weight and physique.

If you suffer from constipation. . .PLEASE BUY THE BED TIME TEA!!! You drink it every other night. . .this will be so freakin’ helpful for you!! (and don’t forget to drink A TON of water after you drink it)

This product doesn’t get a “Goodness Alert” because I feel like most of the weight loss results that people are getting from this tea is because they are following the vegetarian meal plan and doing a pretty intense workout program. It DOES detox, but the perception and draw of this product on Instagram is that it is a weight loss/get skinny/hot tea.

Hope this review was helpful!! Don’t forget to SHARE on your page for your friends and to come back for more goodness :-*

To Purchase:: www.BooTea.com

Growing Pains

I remember when I was growing into an adult that my parents would blame certain people in my life for my “new-found” independent thinking. This baffled me and I would confidently assure my parents that the decisions I was making were my own. . .not of some influential brain-washing of a third party. I had simply reached a time in my life where I was independent enough to financially support myself and therefore make my OWN choices about my OWN life.

Fast-forward to almost 10 years later. . .Never in my WILDEST dreams did I think that little ‘ol me would become the target of parents struggling with the inevitable. . .EMPTY NEST.

I have had MANY parents accuse me of being “involved” and treat me like down right scum Imagebecause their BABY has decided to live a more independent life, or has made choices out of the “norm” that create changes the parents aren’t in CONTROL of.

Enough is enough- folks! The decisions that I was making 10 years ago, and the decisions that I have been accused of influencing ARE NOT HARMFUL!! They may upset you, it may not be your preference, but talk to your child about it! Don’t throw other people under the bus for it.

Basically, you have 2 choices: Either your child is growing up and you can’t handle/cope/deal with it so you DUMP on me (and others), OR they are easily manipulated PUNKS. . .your call. . .you raised ’em.

Stop giving me so much credit for your kids growth spurt-